


Tea and Sugar

by Unfortunate



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, M/M, Other, Platonic Male/Male Relationships, Sad, wolfstar
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-21
Updated: 2015-07-21
Packaged: 2018-04-10 13:45:24
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,873
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4394210
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Unfortunate/pseuds/Unfortunate
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sirius and Remus haven't spoken since the night they reunited in the Shrieking Shack the year before, and although they've been living in Sirius' childhood home for the past few days, it takes an angry conversation about sugar in tea to really get them speaking about the past.<br/>(May turn this into a full story. So far platonic relationship between the two. Some details may be off.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Tea and Sugar

Remus just stared at the man across the kitchen table. The man who he used to know so well; who used to confide in him about things that he was far to embarrassed to share with James (mostly because they were about James…). Now it was as if they had just met. Sirius, entranced by the fire, seemed to not even notice his old friend gazing curiously at him. This was a wrong assumption, of course. Sirius was well aware of Remus; he just wasn’t sure how to start a conversation. The last time they had seen each other was in the shrieking shack, and although Remus realized Sirius was innocent and Peter was very well alive and a traitorous rat (pun intended), he knew the hard feelings were not done with that. There was way too much that each had been through in the 12 years he had been locked up. 

Minutes felt like hours as they sat, and all Sirius wanted to do was slide his chair closer to the fire. Not only did he want to avoid the oncoming storm sitting behind him, but he felt rather cold. Ever since the Dementors almost performed the kiss at the lake, he had a constant coldness in his chest, like his lungs were thawing out. He moved his chair to where he was practically in the fire, and still, he felt no warmth from it. He reached up to button his shirt the rest of the way up, then remembered that he had lost the buttons near the top, and just let the collar corners droop back into their usual spot,  
"Would you like a blanket?" Remus asked from where he was sitting. Sirius sighed; the silence had broken. He shook his head,  
"I doubt it would help, but thank you." he rubbed his hands together, then splayed them out in front of him so at least his fingers could warm up,  
"Then, would you like me to leave? I feel as though I'm intrudi-"  
"No, no. You're fine." Sirius interrupted with a wave of his hand. But in his mind he was screaming 'Yes! YES! Go somewhere else.' He tried to shake that thought from his mind. It wasn't pleasant. He needed friends after being alone for so long,  
"I'm going to make some tea, " Sirius said as he stood up, "Care for a cup?" He looked at Remus. It was the first he had really looked at him in the past two days, because the rest of the time he tried to avoid him and his gaze. Remus seemed surprised by this, also, as he flinched when Sirius laid his dark eyes on him,  
"Er, yes, tea sounds nice. Thank you." Sirius gave a quick nod and turned towards the shelf where the kettle was. He picked it up and brought it to the sink, filling it with water,  
"So," Sirius forced himself to try and make light conversation, "Do you still drink your tea with seven or so sugar cubes?" He gave a tiresome chuckle, as did Remus,  
"No," Remus started, "I'm afraid I've had to start drinking tea with just water."  
"Why do you sound as if it wasn't by choice?" Sirius asked, out of curiosity and simply to keep the conversation going. Remus hesitated, "I, uh…" He closed his mouth, like he would leave it at that, but opened it once again, "It's a long story."  
Sirius screwed his face up in confusion, "A long story about sugar in tea?"  
Remus gave a weak smile, "Yes, I'm afraid so. Shall we talk about something else? Something less domestic?" They both laughed at this, and neither was fake about it. They used to have a joke about who would become the most domestic first, and it just seemed an automatic response to laugh until they both felt the pain of their lost friends who they used to laugh with about it.

But Sirius still wanted to know about the sugar.

He laid the kettle on the rack above the fire, then turned his chair around to face Remus. It felt weird looking at him. He looked so old, so tired. His green eyes had deep bags under them that made him look ten years older than Sirius knew he was,  
"So, about this sugar…" He raised an eyebrow when Remus gave a deep sigh,  
"It's really nothing. I promise, you'll be disappointed." But still, Sirius sat and waited for Remus to tell him,  
"I… It's…" Remus couldn’t figure out how to start, "Well, the Ministry passed a law while you were, uh, away." He took a second to gather his thoughts, "The law states that shop owners, or business owners, are allowed to do full background checks on anyone that applies for employment. And, then…" He looked to Sirius, hoping that this was enough information and that he could stop talking, but Sirius beckoned him on with a slight, confused nod,  
"They, uh, are allowed to release any information they dislike to other shop owners. The purpose is strictly meant for employment, but many use it to, er, discriminate against clients. So, I think you can guess the rest…" Again Sirius gave a confused look as if he wasn’t following what Remus was saying,  
"Oh, for gods sake, Sirius. I've been banned from almost every wizarding shop in the country. No body wants a werewolf working for them or buying from them. Thus no sugar." Sirius suddenly understood, and he sucked in a breath, sorry that he had made Remus talk about it. But then he thought of something,  
"What about muggle shops?" But as soon as he said it, he regretted it. He could see the look of frustration on Remus' face,  
"No, they must have some similar law. I've tried, and actually worked in a couple of stores throughout London, but they aren't too keen on having someone miss work for a week at a time every month. And it seems like words gotten around, because as soon as they see my name now, my application is in the rubbish bin. So, without a job, I've gone quite broke." Sirius felt guilt rack his brain,  
"I'm so sorry, Moon-" He cut himself short before finishing the nickname, "… Remus…" He whispered. 

Sirius couldn’t think of anything else to say. He should have remembered that for Remus, everyday tasks were 30 times more difficult. And then it dawned on him, as it had many times before as he sat with nothing but his thoughts in Azkaban, that Remus was all alone for those twelve years, with no one to help make his life a bit easier. All in one day, he lost all three of his best friends. Of course, so did Sirius, but he at least knew the truth; that he was innocent, and Peter was the traitor.

Sirius looked up at the man he once knew, noting all the scars left on his body from every transformation. Remus wasn't looking back at him, though. He was staring at his hands in his lap, clasped together tight,  
"How did you find out?" Sirius' voice croaked as he asked, his throat tightening as he saw Remus close his eyes shut, trying to keep his composure. He knew they had both been thinking about it.  
There was a long silence, neither moving. Then Remus looked into the fire,  
"It's not something I want to relive, but I expected you might ask…" He took another deep breath, as he had been all night, "Dumbledore told me… He came to my flat. I knew something bad had happened; I can still remember the way his face looked..." He paused, and Sirius could see his eyes flick to him for a fast second before landing back on the fire, "I don't know what I was expecting, but I half thought that he would tell me Voldemort had captured you..." Remus closed his eyes once more, and he wiped away tears that Sirius couldn’t see in the dull firelight, "But it was so much worse than that… He didn't sugar coat it, he came out and told me you betrayed James and Lily. He said that Voldemort murdered them, and when Peter tried to come after you, you killed him and all of those muggles… But when he told me Harry had lived…" Remus stopped to catch his breath, he was choking back sobs, "I wanted to take care of him, but Dumbledore said there were already arrangements in place. Then I demanded to see you…" Sirius didn’t even realize he had been staring at the table, but when he heard this he raised his head, and stared right at Remus; he didn’t know Remus had wanted to see him,  
"But Dumbledore wouldn’t let you?" Sirius asked. Remus shook his head,  
"No, he said I should, but you were already on your way to Azkaban. I tried, I really did. I tried to see you, but the Wizengamot told me that your trial was private, and if found guilty you'd be allowed no visitors. I don't know why I felt such a need to see you, but I guess I just didn't believe you would betray James and Lily like that, or kill all those muggles and Peter..." Remus covered his face with his hand, arm propped onto the table beside him, "But then the Wizengamot… found you guilty, and I-" his whole body shook as he could no longer hold back his cries of anger and sadness. Sirius felt his throat clench painfully as he too tried to hold back, and eventually fail. He could feel warm tears fall off his jaw. He ran his fingers through his hair.

A high whistle caused both men to jump, "The kettle…" Sirius mumbled under his breath. He wiped his face with his sleeve then stood and grabbed the kettle from the fire, taking it to the counter. As he reached it though, he felt his knees give out and he grabbed onto the edge of the wood, leaning on his arms. He felt as though he couldn’t hold himself up. He stood there sobbing, for a good few minutes before, behind him, there was the sound of a chair being scraped against the ground, then dull footsteps coming closer to him. Remus grabbed Sirius' wrist, pulling him away from the counter, and looked right into the dark eyes he'd known so well years before. Sirius looked right back at him, he gave a weak laugh, "Don’t we look like quite the mess…" he whispered. Remus sniffed and gave a small chuckle,  
"Go sit, I'll make the tea. You were always shit at it anyways… and I doubt you'd gotten much practice in prison." He added, trying to lighten the mood. Sirius gave a faint nod and started back towards his seat, but he was held back by the hand holding his wrist. He looked down at it, then up at Remus who gave one last look at Sirius before letting go and turning to the cupboard, pulling out two teacups. Sirius stood there for a second longer, staring at Remus' back, then went and sat down, feeling his chest grow just that much warmer.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading!! Sorry if anything is misspelled or different from the actual books. Characters do not belong to me. I've only just started book 5 of the HP series, so I know i may be missing a bit.


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